We celebrated my friend Susie Wiberg this weekend. Over 300 of us. As she had requested, it was a big party. The margaritas flowed. So did the laughter – and the tears.
I met Susie years ago, when I chaired the American Cancer Society’s Relay for Life for several years in our community. At that time Susie worked for Chic-Fil-A. I can’t remember if her title at the time, but she was the giver of free things to worthy charities.
I hated calling people I don’t know. I hated asking for donations. Still, I had a great team of volunteers who showed up around the dinner hour and I went out of my comfort zone to ask some places for freebies. Before I ever met Susie in person, she was my kind and generous friend. She provided foid for every meeting we had – and plenty of it.
It’s a bit ironic to me, having met her as she helped us raise money for cancer research and care, that her second round of breast cancer took her life.
Well, it tried to take her life. She outsmarted it (as she would do) and lived until she was finished with flair and compassion and humor, and lots of fight. She volunteered all over the community until the very end. I’m not going to list all she did because I’m sure I don’t know everything, and I can boil it all down to this – she made her life matter. She lived it in a way that her heartbeat will ripple through this community creating positive and active change for generations.
I got to welcome guests on Saturday and pass out name tags. I promise you I didn’t let anyone get by me without one. Susie loved name tags and thought they were critical to most gatherings.
In December our Missions Board at church held a dinner fir the resident staff at our local homeless shelter. Susie chaired thaf board for years, and I took over as chair only because she decided to take that off her plate when dealing with chemotherapy. I’ll admit, the job still terrifies me, but Susie was there to set me straight if I did anything “wrong”.
Anyway, she had reminded our board that we did need name tags. I tried to find them befor the dinner, but waited until the last minute to do it. I went to three places, and none had name tags. I showed up without them saying “People are just going to have to introduce themselves.”
Susie arrived, and she gave me that look. You know that look friends give you when you failed. Like others may give you in life, but with tough love.
The next thing I knew she had found clothespins and paper and everyone was sporting these unusual but effective name tags, most hand-written by her.
(Telling that story just made me order a thousand name tags to put around our church so this will not happen again for a while.)
When Susie lost her hair due to chemo, she had her scalp covered with henna tattoos. Beautiful, and meaningful, and if you looked closely defiant. Here’s one of the stories about them.
Her husband Tom wanted the pictures that decorated Southern Distillery, where her party was held, to be taken by those who wanted them, so I looked through them to pick “mine” yesterday. After a lot of contemplation, I took the one above. Susie rocking her warrior haircut, smiling broadly, and surrounded by color. It all seemed to fit for me.
I hate calling Susie an inspiration, because it seems cliche. She was, but I prefer to think of her as an explosive. When she was on earth she exploded everywhere. She was an agent of passion, stepping in and doing what she could to make life better for so many. We need to look at the world through her eyes, and when we notice people who need help, animals who need care, causes that need to be fought – we shouldn’t hesitate, but jump in and make it our business.
I’ll miss you my friend, but I expect I’ll feel your pushes and hear your laughter forever.
In the Box, Out of the Box 